LELO Luxury Sex Toy Sona 2 waterproof Vibrator Unboxing Review – “clitorally” squirts and vibrates with my bubble jacuzzi! / LELO奢華高級情趣用品開箱試用文 Sona 2防水按摩器讓妳在享受泡泡浴之餘跟著按摩浴缸一起「噴水」搖擺!

Watch our Youtube LELO Sona 2 vibrator unboxing video first / 先看時尚高潮YT開箱影片:

(中文版向下看 / scroll down for Chinese version)

My first experience with the luxury sex toy brand LELO was reviewing their Soraya 2 Vibrator. in that post, I’ve already expressed how it turned me into an “independent woman” who doesn’t need a man’s dingdong or “number 2,” (as we call “it” in Taiwan); I can be the Alpha, the “Top-dog” on my own.
This time I tried the LELO’s waterproof Sona 2 while running my bubble bath, I never knew I could feel all “fancy” while doing “dirty” stuff.

中文版 / Chinese version:
我第一次接觸奢華情趣用品品牌LELO的商品是上次分享他們的Soraya 2 按摩棒的開箱文,那篇文中我已經表達了它如何讓我說變成跟碧昂絲一樣不需要男人「老二」的「獨立女性」,因為有了它,我自己當「老大」。

這次殘編開箱的是LELOSona 2防水情趣按摩器,使用後我才知道,原來自己偷偷做保守老人家可能認為「污穢」的事情時還能有種「貴婦」的奢華感。

LELO Luxury Sex Toy Sona 2 waterproof Vibrator Unboxing Review – “clitorally” squirts and vibrates with my bubble jacuzzi! LELO奢華高級情趣用品開箱試用文 Sona 2防水按摩

Celebrating Singles Day with my Sona 2 / 跟我的Sona 2一起過1111「單身節」

November 11th is Remembrance Day, and it just happens to be my birthday. Growing up, every year on my birthday, we are herded to the auditorium to watch through images of the honourable veterans who fought for us. So instead of celebrating my birthday, I had to refrain myself from putting up a smile to show respect to these courageous veterans. It made me wonder about life and questioned myself if I was born a disaster like my mom says. After a chain of tragic life-events, I was convinced that there was nothing to celebrate for my birthday and started to celebrate my “re-birthday (the day I had my stroke)” instead. However, in recent years, 1111 has earned a new title called the “Singles Day.” If not celebrating “disaster day (aka. my birthday)”, I have another excuse to rejoice for being eligible for “Singles Day” woot! Woot! Luckily, I received my LELO Sona 2 just in time to celebrate being “me,” disaster or not, and an excuse for a “staycation” for some “me-time”!

中文版 / Chinese version:

11 月 11日在美加是「國殤紀念日」(Remembrance Day)用來悼
念所有在第一、二次世界大戰和其他戰爭中勇敢為國犧牲的軍人日子。很不巧的,這天剛好也是殘編的生日。在國外成長過程中,每年生日到校報到後的第一件事就是被集合到視聽教室看在戰爭中陣亡的戰士的換燈片,換燈片中往往包含一些血肉模糊的遺體照片。美加非常尊重軍人,這天店家餐廳都會推出軍官專屬的免費招待餐跟優惠,路上遇到穿軍服的路人,也會上前行禮表達尊重與感恩的心情。因此,為了表示哀悼與尊重,每年生日,我必須克制笑容,以免不敬。這讓我開始懷疑人生,懷疑自己是否在出生冥冥之中,就有著不幸的象征?今年的1111,我33歲了。一生的跌跌撞撞,讓我更相信自己就是「衰尾道人」,也確信我的「出生」沒有什麼值得慶祝的,因此我開始改成慶祝我的「重生日」(中風的那一天)。近年來,1111除了「光棍節」還多了一個「單身節」的稱號;這新興的「單身節」倒是給了我一謝安撫,因為身為「單身」的我,就算不為了生日慶祝也可藉「單身節」之名理直氣壯的來慶祝「我」!耶~!於是我帶上我全新的Sona 2,幫自己訂了一間有按摩浴缸的旅館,要來認真的測試一下它「防水」的能耐。

The Sona 2 Design / LELOSONA 2 按摩器的設計:

While the Soraya 2 has a sleek curve and shines and elegant in your cupboard, the Sona 2 is adorable with a silhouette that looks almost like an octopus with its mouth open waiting to be “fed.” Sona 2 comes in 3 playful colours: cerise (pink), purple, or black. Mine is an adorable cerise to go with my pink cane and almost everything else I own.

中文版 / Chinese version:

Soraya 2按摩棒有光滑的弧線,可以優雅的陳列在櫥櫃中。Sona 2走可愛路線,其輪廓看似張嘴等待「進食」的章魚。Sona 2有3種俏皮的顏色:粉紅色,紫色或黑色。我的是俏麗的粉紅色,搭配我的粉紅色拐杖和我殘腦所購入的其他粉色系東西。

  • Sona 2 Can do Everything a Mouth can Do / 一張嘴能做的,SONA 2通通做得到

Just like its design promises, Sona 2 can do everything one can do with his/her mouth. And if you’ve met the right person, you know the mouth alone can do A LOT, sometimes more than the “#2″ down there. And when it’s done right, it’s “clitorally” mind-blowing! Instead of vibrating, it sucks, blows, vibrates, and the silicone material provides a soft and gentle pulsation just like human lips.

中文版 / Chinese version:

就像其設計承諾一樣,Sona 2可以達到人類用嘴所能做到的所有事情。遇過的女人都懂,單憑嘴巴就可以達到很多事情,厲害的甚至勝過樓下的「老二」。如果技巧對了,便是皇「蒂」般的享受!它不只會振動;吸,吹、拍通通有。矽樹脂材料更是像真的嘴唇一樣柔軟溫柔。

  • With the updated larger “mouth,” SONA 2 can fully cover the external

part of your clitoris. If not, you seriously need to go book a checkup with your gynecologist, girl. With just 3 buttons, the device provides up to 12 different modes, so if you’re a romantic who needs some music to get you into the mood, it can match your rhythm.

中文版 / Chinese version:

第2代的SONA 2有更新版的「嘴」,更大更深,可以完全覆蓋您的陰蒂。如果無法,殘編認真建議你立刻掛婦科就醫檢查。章魚上才三個按鈕便可提供12種不同的震動模式。因此如果您是一個感性需要音樂來進入情緒的人,它也可以配合您的節奏。

Fast Charging, Long-Lasting / SONA2充電超快速,效果更持久:

Just like the Soraya 2, charging for Sona 2 only takes 20 minutes and guarantees to last until you erupt like a fountain; and I’m talking about Iceland’s Eyjafjallajökull volcano level. Multiple eruptions, baby.

 

中文版 / Chinese version:

殘編上次開箱的Soraya 2一樣, Sona 2充電僅需20分鐘,卻能持續到您像火山一樣「爆發」為止。我說的可是冰島艾雅法拉冰蓋
(Eyjafjallajökull)火山程度(多次爆發)。

  • “Waterbed?” or need a waterproof mattress cover? Sona’s Waterproof function’s got you “covered” /「水床」或「防水床墊」困擾?別擔心, Sona的防水功能「罩」你

LELO Luxury Sex Toy Sona 2 waterproof Vibrator Unboxing Review - “clitorally” squirts and vibrates with my bubble jacuzzi! LELO奢華高級情趣用品開箱試用文 Sona 2防水按摩
LELO Luxury Sex Toy Sona 2 waterproof Vibrator Unboxing Review – “clitorally” squirts and vibrates with my bubble jacuzzi! LELO奢華高級情趣用品開箱試用文 Sona 2防水按摩

Let’s just say, friends call me “fontana,” which translates to “fountain” from Italian while I studied my masters in Italy. All “fountains” share the same troubles:

  1.  You either need a closet full of bedsheets or a waterproof mattress cover:

If you’ve had a great night, your bed turns into a “waterbed” and you’d rather relocate to the pull-out-couch for the night even if it means heading to work the next day with a massive backache; because if the myth “one ejaculation is equivalent to sprinting 100 metres, nobody has the energy to do chores and change sheets after multiple eruptions.

  • 2. Sex toys are disposable:

This one is simple. Because they’re not waterproof.

中文版 / Chinese version:

在意大利的閨蜜稱我為 “fontana” (義大利文 「噴泉」之意)。所有「噴泉」都有以下相同的煩惱:

  • #1您需要一個裝滿床單的櫃子或一個防水床墊套:

不然一個美好的夜晚舒服過後帶來的卻是不舒服的「水床」,乾脆搬到客廳睡沙發上,寧可明天腰痠背痛上班去,因為如果謠言所說的「射一次等於衝刺100米」,那誰還有精力在社N刺後做家事換床單?

  • #2。情趣用品都是「拋棄式」的:

原因很簡單,因為它們不防水。

  • For Sona 2, I picked a staycation with jacuzzi,

because after unboxing Sona 2 and examining the product, Alicia Keys‘ “A Woman’s Worth” somehow just got stuck in my head.
So I “ran my bubble bath” and celebrated the best Singles Day; because I know “a woman’s worth.”
And you’re all worth it.

為了跟我的Sona 2好好玩,殘編特地訂了一家有按摩浴缸的旅館,因為自從Sona 2開箱閱讀產品資訊後,美國才女歌手艾莉西亞·凱斯
(Alicia Keys) 的主打歌“女人的價值” (A woman’s Worth)就卡在了我腦海裡。
於是,我就照著歌詞「洗我的泡泡浴」,享受一個最好的單身節。因為我懂「女人的價值」
而所有女性同胞們,妳們都是值得的。

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